Hold On Tight

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Have you ever had a moment where you really like the person that God is shaping you to be? It's not a narcissistic thing to think, if anything I believe you're giving God credit for the work that He is doing in your life. 

I've had a few of these moments this past week. As many of you know, the past two years of my life, specifically last semester, was the most trying time of my life. I lost friends, valued relationships, money, dreams and a much longer list of things. Over Christmas break, I found myself ready to duke it out with God.  "How could you do this to me?" I yelled at Him one night. "What have I done to deserve this?" I became angrier at God because as I called out to Him, I felt nothing. Growing up, whenever I prayed or called out to God, I always felt as if He was listening. But, here I was, crying out to Him as my world fell apart, and He was being silent. I felt hurt and abandoned. 

I am now about three weeks into my second semester at college here at John Brown in Arkansas. And honestly, I am having one of the best times of my life. If you had told me, last month during Christmas break, that I'd be feeling this way, I would have told you that you were crazy. 

I am now so thankful that God allowed me to go through those trials and that He took away many things that were important in my life. Although the friends, relationships and material things that I valued were not wrong or sinful, I had made them way too important in my life. The several emotional breakdowns that I had throughout the course of Thanksgiving and Christmas showed me how greatly I valued them. And, it is not wrong to value things. However, I had become okay with just being okay in my relationship with God because I had everything that I needed and wanted. 

Now that God, in His grace, chose to take away all of that stuff, I was forced once again to become completely dependent on Him and to trust Him. And, looking back, I am able to see that all of that stuff that was taken away was for my good! Just like Romans 8:28 says, "All things work together for good for those who love Him and have been called according to His purpose". 

Since I have begun to focus clearly on God, He has begun to do some awesome things. First, and maybe most exciting: I've been asked to start a ministry group on campus dedicated to ending sex slavery. How cool is that? The only reason I'll be able to do this is because God has matured me and greatly freed up my schedule. Second, I've made some amazingly awesome new friends. Before, I had been so preoccupied with other relationships and just silly old stuff that I had not developed and nourished friendships. Yes, I had friends, but not the deep friendships that I have now. I've even found my roommate for next year. Boo-yeahhh! Thirdly, and probably the most important: God has begun to change my hear to be more like His. I've noticed that I'm more kind in my actions, words and thoughts. My desire to serve others has become some much less selfish. No longer is it that I want people to notice me because I'm serving them, but that I want to serve others because God is the example of the Great Servant. Finally, God has worked on my heart in phenomenal ways. I was able to forgive my mom, something that I never ever thought possible! 

Now, I'm not saying all of this to brag and be like, "hey, look how great my life is!". If you're going through a difficult trial, you're probably thinking I can't relate because my life is going so great right now and you've just lost everything. No, that's not what I'm trying to do. What I'm trying to do is encourage you to HANG ON! HANG ON TIGHT! Hang on tight to your faith even when you feel like God is not close (and, Jesus promised He'd never leave us nor forsake us! So we know feeling abandoned is a lie straight from Satan!) My trying season lasted for OVER TWO YEARS! That is an incredibly long time. I lost everything that I thought was important. Now, though, after God has brought me through that, I am able to go: Woah, God, thank you so much. Because now, I am becoming the person that God wants me to be! Because He took away all that stuff I am now able to serve Him better. And, I've become more kind, friendly, selfless and empathetic! I would not be able to go, "God, I really like the person that you're creating me to be" unless I went through that time of remolding. It was painful but greatly needed. 

So please, if you're reading this, just hold on to your faith tight. Remember, God works all things together for good, for *YOUR good. Even if it may not seem it at the moment. Believe me, I've been there. I've questioned His goodness. And now, over two years later, I am beginning to see some of His purposes. 

Remember, our life in Christ makes us NEW creations! When we choose to follow Christ, we choose to let God have all of us, every single part of our being, and to shape us into the person He wants us to be. Although this is painful, it is also awesome! 

"... anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!" 2 Cor. 5:17

The Weirdest Thing. Ever.

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There are quite a few weird things in this universe of ours. As a previous biology major and a current Child & Family Studies major, I've had the privileged of seeing my fair share of "weird" things. Some fish have the ability to change gender. Clown fish are actually all born male and there is only one female clown fish per colony. When the female dies, she secretes a hormone that causes the largest male clown fish to turn into a female, and the cycle continues. That's really weird. In families, there are also some "weird" issues. Some parents practice un-gender, un-schooling and un-parenting. They allow the child to choose if they want to be known as a male or female, they do not have rules as this hinders the child's creativity and they don't force the child to go to school, instead they believe the entire world is a classroom and the child should only learn what they want. To many modern Americans, this would be "weird".
However, I believe there is something much, much stranger than gender changing fish or gender choosing or weird family structures. It's this thing called forgiveness, and if you think about it, forgiveness goes against just about everything we're taught.

True, deep, meaningful forgiveness is much different than the forgiveness we're taught in kindergarten. When we're 5, someone takes our toy and we tell the teacher. The teacher makes them say they're sorry and we say "I forgive you". Most of the time, we'll be best friends again before the day is out and totally forget about the incident.

The kind of forgiveness I want to talk about is the forgiving of deep hurt. Hurt that slaps you in your face every morning and burns wounds deeper and deeper everyday. It's the kind of forgiveness that people use to forgive unforgivable people: their rapist, the person that murdered their child, the parent that abused and abandoned them.

I've really been struggling to find this kind of forgiveness for the past 3 years! I've been struggling to forgive my parents, specifically my mom. As many of you know, I was raised by my grandparents. My parents had me as teenagers, and neither one of them were emotionally ready to be parents. Growing up, I slowly grew to hate them. Yes, hate. Every time I saw my mom I would become angry. All I could think about was all of the horrible things she had said and done to me. Every time I saw her, I wanted to be as mean as I could and make her hurt just a little of the way she had made me hurt. Although this sounds terrible, I'm being honest.

Over the past two years, this hate I've carried towards my mom has really begun to weigh me down. Last year, my mom reached out to me and wrote me a really kind and sincere apology note. For her, that was a huge step. However, I was so angry at her and so focused on hating her that I didn't even really read it. How terrible is that? I continued to tell everyone and remind myself about the terrible things she'd said and done instead of how she'd reached out.

This past semester, God has really been calling me to forgive my mom, but man, it's so hard! Because honestly, part of me does not want to let that hate go. What I've learned, though, is that hating someone is like drinking poison and expecting it to kill the other person. This hate is weighing me down so much! Every time my mom has reached out this past year, I've completely shut her down. Instead of acknowledging my mom's effort, and the possibility that she has changed, all I think about is all the horrible stuff from when I was little. And, just believe me when I say there was some horrible stuff.

Being at a Christian college, I'm constantly surrounded by symbols of redemption and forgiveness. It's so easy for me to think "Jesus forgave me, so I'm all set". However, I realized I never really took the time to think how DIFFICULT it must have been for Christ and God to forgive me. We hear, "God loved us so much that He sent Jesus", we make it sound easy. We often forget that we were an ENEMY of God. Romans 5:8: "But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us."

HOW DIFFICULT it must have been for God to send Jesus, part of Himself, to die for my sins so that He could forgive me! When Christ was being tortured by His own Creation on the cross, God couldn't even look at Him. I wonder if God was mad at Creation like He had been right before the Flood when He regretted creating humans. Here we were, His creation, torturing part of Him. Even after we did that, and Jesus rose from the dead, we still continue to sin against Him in disgusting ways. Do you ever think it's difficult for Him to forgive us?
Many of you would say no, because He loves us so much that it's easy. Well then, I want that kind of love. I talk all the time about how I want to be more like God, and man, I want to mean that. I want to love people SO DEEPLY that it becomes impossible for me to hate them and easy to love them. But, how do I start doing this?

I believe the first step is forgiveness. To me, forgiveness is so much more than just a word. To me, forgiveness is saying, "You wronged me. But I love God so much, that I am able to love you. Loving you does not mean I have to like you, it does not even mean that I am saying what you did is okay. Instead, I am able to look past the fact that you hurt me in a deep way, and try to find that thing that God loves about you and love that aspect of you more than dislike what I dislike about you." Forgiving people makes us free. We don't have to carry around the heavy burden of our hate any more.

Ironically, while I was writing this, "Forgiveness" by Matthew West came on my radio. There was one set of verses that really stood out to me:

I want to finally set it free

So show me how to see what Your mercy sees

Help me now to give what You gave to me

Forgiveness, Forgiveness

 When I think about it, God really had to forgive a lot in my life. He didn't have to, but He did. And man, after so many years of carrying around this hate, I just want to be free. I want to be able to talk to my mom without getting angry. I want to be able to ENJOY spending time with her, something that I don't think I've ever tried to do. 

So, I'm going to start with saying some pretty awesome things about my mom. First, she chose to have me and give me life, something that some teens who find out they are pregnant chose not to do. That must have been terrifying. Second, my mom is one of the strongest people I've ever met. She's endured so much hurt in her life and still chooses to move forward. Third, my mom gives and gives to others. If someone ever needs something she is there. I remember a few times growing up when one of her friends would need something and she would be there or give them a place to stay. Fourth, my mom still chooses to talk to me and be part of my life even though I've been really nasty.

Confession: The blog post has taken me over a month to write. And last night, as I was reading through it, I broke down crying. I finally did the impossible. At 12:30AM, I called my mom balling, and told her I forgave her and that I loved her. She was shocked. And, let me tell you, I have never felt so FREE in my entire life (I got saved when I was little, so I can't exactly remember how freeing that decision felt). I told my mom that even if she wasn't sorry and even if she didn't change, I still completely forgave her for every single thing she's done and everything she'll do in the future. My forgiveness is not a contract based on terms that if she does X, Y and Z then I'll forgive her. No, my forgiveness is promising to now always look past the hurt she's caused me and love her as close as I can to the love Christ has for her. This was a total God thing. And, as I said, I've never felt so free in my entire life. 

I hope this has encouraged you to consider forgiving those who have hurt you very deeply in your own life! Real, genuine forgiveness, I believe, is impossible without God. I believe that the first step to forgiveness, then, is to go to Him and ask for strength and help.

I wonder how many storms we create in our own life by the hate we choose to carry around?  How fewer storms may there be if we simply let go of the hate we carry and chose to love and forgive?

~Yes, before anyone asks, my mom did give me permission to post this. I sent her this entire post and had her read over it and approve it before I posted it :-) ~ 

One Step Closer...

It's my birthday everyone, woohoo! It's crazy to think that this is my last year as a teenager and that I'm more than 1/2 way done with my first year of college. Life really does fly by!

Birthdays, for me at least, are always a time of reflection. In the techno ago in which we live, birthday wishes are usually given through texts, emails and facebook posts. This method of wishing happy birthday requires less effort, is faster and requires less thought. I am in no way saying that this is bad! Personally, I love getting dozens of well wishes from people! Because of this faster, easier method of well wishing, many people wish me happy birthday that I haven't seen in years but am friends with on Facebook. Their posts cause me to think about the last time I saw them, what we were doing and why I haven't seen them sense. It causes me to reflect on our relationship. This birthday, I decided to do something a little different. Although God hasn't sent me a text or email I'm sure He's thinking about me. Yes, He does think of each one of us constantly, but I think today He may be admiring His handiwork and be thinking, "Man I'm excited that she's finally beginning to really trust me, so that she can do the ministry I've called her into to the best of her ability!" 

This past year, God has provided for me in ah-may-zing ways! At times He was my umbrella and at others He was my tornado shelter. During this past semester I thought the pain and hurt I felt would never end as He allowed one trial after another (some were extremely painful, mind you) into my life. At times I called out for mercy, for peace  for comfort and I felt empty. At times, I honestly wondered if He'd left (funny how we think crazy, untrue things like that when things aren't going the way that we'd wanted). Now, however, He has delivered me from those trials. He is giving me wisdom to look back on the trials, especially the ones that were the most painful, and make me realize that those were for my good! God is blessing me so much already this year and I am very, very thankful that He allowed me to go through those trials. Most importantly, that He carried me through!

Each birthday, although I'm only 19, reminds me that I'm one birthday closer to going home. True, each day, each minute, each second, we are closer to going Home. As a believer in the life, death and resurrection of Christ, I know where my eternal home is. I can be excited and filled with hope that this pain-filled world is not my home. That I am not simple a bunch of macro molecules that occurred by accident and has no purpose. Instead, with Christ, I am a greatly valued and created being. Who He desires and seeks after, to the point where He came as a man, was suffered and tortured so that one day I may be with Him. People mention all the time how they are excited for the gold streets and big houses of heaven. Personally, as someone who just finished going through some very difficult trials, I'm just excited to be with the God of peace in a perfect place. A place where there is nothing but joy! A place where sin has not touched a thing! Picture that for a second: A place where sin has not corrupted your body, your relationships, the animals, the plants NOTHING! Yeah, wow! I cannot wait to go there! Don't get me wrong, I completely love life and the ministries to which God has called me, but man. My soul is excited to go home. And, I'm sure with more birthdays, although I'll be finding new ways to love life, my soul will become more and more excited to go Home. 

Where's your home? Who carries you through storms? I pray that you are able to have this hope that I'm talking about. If not, message me or ask someone you know that is a professing Christian. There would be no greater birthday gift than to have God use me to help someone else decide to make Heaven their eternal home!. 

Heffalumps and Woozles

Winnie the Pooh has a very big fear of Heffalumps and Woozles. They made him hug his honey jars tighter and hide under his covers. Although Heffalumps and Woozles seem silly to us, mainly because we know that they are not real, but they are very real and scary to Pooh. Likewise, what may seem scary to me may seem silly to you. And, what may seem scary to you may not be scary to me. 

I've been thinking a lot about fears lately. This past month I went back to Vermont for Christmas break. Although I do have neighbors we are so far spaced out that when I look out any of my windows at night I cannot see any lights. I would often be up really late in the kitchen making cookie dough (I own a small cookie dough business) after my grandma went to sleep. I'd be up alone, in the dark, surrounded by big, dark windows. I am terrified of the dark. Yes, terrified. Two nights I became so scared that I stopped making cookie dough although I had several batches left to make and ran into my room and shut the door. I know, this is kind of pathetic for a 19-year-old, but I'm being honest. As I laid under my covers and thinking about how sad it was that I just ran into my room because I was scared of the darkness outside my windows, I did a lot of thinking and praying. As I thought about my fear, prayed, and read my Bible more I realized some things. I want to share these with you to encourage you. 

What do you fear? I may be something such as the dark, like me. Or maybe spiders or snakes or birds. Maybe it's a fear that you've developed because of experiences you have had, such as a fear of being lonely or not meeting other people's expectations. Maybe you fear the future. Perhaps you just received terrible health news about yourself or a loved one. I just don't know what you fear. What I do know though, is that our God is bigger. Our God created whatever you fear. Since He created it, He ultimately controls it. Now, this is not to say that what you fear will never happen. If you're afraid of spiders, there's a good chance you will see a spider at some point. However, what I believe is most important is to remember that God is not absent simply because He allowed your fear to happen. 

Why are fears bad? I think the most damaging thing about fears is that fears are crippling. Fears keep us from doing what God calls us to do. Sometimes, God asks us to go outside of our comfort zone. 

Gideon, like all Israelities, was very afraid of the Midianities. The Midianities were stronger and bigger than the Israelities, and the Israelities were so afraid of them that they hid in caves! When the Angel of the Lord (AOFT) appeared to Gideon, Gideon asked Him questions like you and I would. He asked how bad things could happen if God really was with the Isrealites. What had happened to the God that used to preform great miracles, did He not care about them anymore? The AOFT then asked Gideon to do something terrifying: to go fight the Midianities. Gideon, like us, was scared and began making excuses. He was the weakest man of the weakest tribe, he said. The AOFT then told Gideon that he could do it, because He would help him. 

Likewise, when we face big challenges. Big scary things. Such as Heffalumps, the dark, spiders or the future, we shouldn't be afraid. As Christians, we know that God has created and called us with a purpose. Allowing our fears to cripple us keeps us from doing what He wants us to do. 

Gideon, with God's help, went on to conquer the Midianities. Gideon and the Israelites saw God work. In order to do this, though, they needed to get over their fear that had crippled them to the point of living in caves. Similarly  I need to overcome my fear of the dark. I need to allow God to help me to do this, so that I can strip away everything that may possibly keep me from serving Him.  

Hops, Skips and Jumps of Faith

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Sometimes God asks us to make hops of faith. Other times He asks us to skip. Sometimes, though, He asks us to make big, scary jumps. Each time, though, He promises to catch us and never let us fall completely, "Give your burdens to the LORD and He will take care of you. He will never let the righteous slip and fall" (Pslam 55:22) . Sometimes, we will step away from God and we'll stumble and our knees will get scraped or we may fall so bad that we need stitches. Each time He will heal us and make us even stronger. He will never ask us to do anything that He will not give us the strength to do.

As I was thinking about this, I realized God asks us to make our own hops, skips and jumps on a daily basis. When you use your credit or debit card to pay for groceries, do you absolutely know you will have the money when the bill is due? No, a lot can happen in a month. You kind of subconsciously trust that God will provide. I just had to make a big college payment. I use credit cards (that's a different story) and I trust that God will provide me with the money. I believe with all my heart that God wants me at John Brown University, and I have seen Him provide and awesome ways to keep me there.

That's the cool thing about being a Christian: we know that if we are following God's word and what He wants us to do, He will provide. Jesus specifically promised to take care of us:

 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes?  Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?" Matthew 6:25-26

Throughout the Bible God provided for His people in amazing ways! When the Israelities were in the desert after being led out of Egypt, God caused water to come out of rocks and food to fall from the sky! Keep in mind that He provided this to them after they continued to sin against Him. After God continued to provide time and time again the Israelities continued to sin and even asked to go back to Egypt! Yet, God continued to provide because He knew what their ultimate purpose was: to preserve the Jews, His chosen and promised people, so that they would bare the Messiah. The Messiah that offers salvation to you and me! 

Likewise, if you are doing what God has called you to do, He will provide. Whether that be tithing, volunteering or selling everything that you have to be a missionary where He has called you, He will provide for all of your emotional and physical needs. Not always in the way that you had planned, but He will provide. Remember, God did not give the Israelites in the desert a grand feast, He gave them water and bread. Just because He will provide does not always mean that He will provide in the way that you expected or necessarily wanted. 

You may be thinking, "Wait, Krista. God doesn't provide like that anymore". Well, the God that you and I worship is unchanging, "Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today and forever" (Hebrews 13:8). God is smart, and as times change He begins to provide in different ways. If you need food and are unable to buy it, perhaps God will have someone anonymously drop food off on your doorstep or have someone tell you about the local food bank  Does God still have the ability to make food fall out of the sky? Yes, He is still God. But do not think that this is the only way that He will do it. Do not put on blinders and not see how God is providing. 

Ask older or mature Christians in your church, or simply Christians that you know have been through a lot, about how God has provided for them. You may be amazed at what they have to say. 

Therefore, if God is asking you today to make a hop, skip or jump of faith, be confident. Whether He is asking you to give to a charity, to become a foster parent or maybe become a missionary over seas, trust that He will provide. He will give you the emotional strength to do whatever He is calling you to do and then will give you the physical supplies to complete that task. Remember, "Give your burdens to the LORD and He will take care of you. He will never let the righteous slip and fall" (Pslam 55:22). 

The Big "T" Issue

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What are you willing to trust God with? I know that sounds like a simple question, but really, think about it...
Will you trust Him with your relationships? Your wealth? Your family? Your dreams? To forgive your past?

Before you answer that, I think a more important question is: what does it even mean to trust God? These are questions that I've always struggled with, especially these past two years.

My Journey 

I've always had a serious worry issue growing up. I worried about ev-er-ry-thing. Seriously. Everything. As I look back, there was not a moment growing up when I wasn't worrying about something. I believe this issue was rooted directly in some of my early childhood experiences. I was born to teen parents, neither of which were ready to have children. My dad was out of the picture for most of my childhood and my mother was an emotional wreck. She hadn't had it easy and looking back, I don't know if I can blame her for being emotionally unstable. If I said something wrong or did something wrong she would start screaming and yelling and would say horrible things. When her boyfriend would come over, I'd have to tip-toe on glass or I would have to deal with him and her. I eventually went to live with my grandparents, but lived in constant fear that if I messed up they'd send me back to live with her. I always had to be good enough so that they would love me and accept me (although being "good enough" is a different topic). That's a lot of pressure for a 7-year-old.

During middle and high school my worry issues got a lot worse. If I didn't get an A on every paper and test I was certain that I wouldn't get into college. I honestly convinced myself of that. If I didn't constantly bend over backwards to please everyone, give people money and gifts (even to people I didn't like) then everyone would hate me and I'd be lonely. In addition to constantly worrying what would happen if I didn't do X Y and Z, I also worried about the future. When I was 16 and still hadn't had a boyfriend I was convinced I was ugly and would be single forever. If a person didn't text me back within 5 minutes they must not want to talk anymore. Yes, you're probably thing "Man, Krista, those thoughts are ridiculous", and I agree.

I never really verbalized these thoughts in fear of being labeled a lunatic. However, by not talking about my worry issue I didn't begin to work through it. When I was 15, I met a group of wonderful friends at a Christian summer camp where we all worked. They were all from wonderful, strong Christian families and I was really able to feed off their wisdom.

When you become really good friends with someone, or are forced to spend a lot of time with someone, you begin to pick up their habits. You know their thinking face and lying face. You know their fake laugh and their real laugh. And my friends began to tell what I did when I was worried. They began to notice that although I tried to hide it, I worried about everything. Especially the silly things, like freaking out when someone didn't reply to a text.

One day, one of those friends said to me, "Kris, do you trust God?" I was caught off guard  "Of course!" I answered. "No, sweetie (she always calls people sweetie. She's a mother in preparation, I swear!), no you don't. If you did, you wouldn't worry so much". Honestly, I was kind of mad. Who was she to tell me that I didn't trust God? On my long drive back home I really began to think about what she said. You can get a lot of thinking done in 2 hours in a car by yourself. What I realized, although not happily, was that she was right. If I trust God, I really wouldn't worry so much. Specifically, this verse came to memory: "Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank Him for all he has done.  Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand." (Phil. 4:6-7)

That verse really hit home! After all, Paul wrote that while he was in prison. He could be beaten or killed at any moment but yet he is not worried? He is telling me, a believer almost 2,000 years later not to worry? Wow. 

These past three years, I'm thankful that by God's grace I've made some major improvements in my worry issue. Don't get me wrong, it's still a struggle. When someone doesn't answer an important text for awhile I have to remind myself that they're busy. When I don't do well on a test I have to remind myself that it won't matter in 20 years. It's a struggle, but I'm gaining ground. 

What I've Learned

Worry goes hand-in-hand with not trusting God. When I choose to worry about something I am telling God that He is not big enough. That He is not strong enough. And that He does not know what He is doing. The God that I believe in is the God that created everything. The God that parted the Red Sea. The God that brought dry bones to life. If I really believe all that, then I should know that a bad test grade is not going to stop God from using me to complete whatever tasks He wants me to complete. Afterall, look at the Israelites! Their sin, captivity and lack of faith could not stop God from having the Messiah be born! 

I know for me, it's difficult to trust God with my future. My dreams and goals, such as to be a wife and mommy, are really important to me. It's what I feel I've been created to do. When I do worry that I'll never get married (I know, I'm 19. I'm just being honest) or be a mom, I have to remember that I am no longer living my life. I am living for Christ. I believe God does give people desires and callings but we choose daily to be slaves to His purpose. Yes slave, read 1 Cor. 7:22. Therefore, I willingly give Christ all of my dreams and desires. I do this because I trust Him so much, that I am willing to say, "Okay God, I know you will do what is best. So I give you everything I have. Especially the things that are important to me". Trusting God is scary but so worth it. And, the more you trust Him, less scary it seems! 

On Earth, when we trust someone, we know we can depend on them. We can tell them a secret and know that they won't tell. We can give them money to go to the store and buy something for us and know that they won't spend any extra. With God, trust is similar. We know that He knows what is best (Jer. 29:11). Even though we face trials and scary moments we know God has everything under control. We don't have to fear because He has the problem solved before we know what the problem is. God is cool like that. 

Trusting God means that although the rainstorm is pouring down and a twister may be coming in the distance, we do not have to be afraid. We know that God has everything all worked out. By worrying, we miss seeing Him do His thing of fixing our problems. He's been fixing problems longer than we've been worrying. Most importantly, though, we miss being able to dance in the rain. 

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Welcome to My Journey

Hi friends and anyone else who happens to stumble upon this page!

For the past few months, I've really felt a desire to begin a blog about what God is teaching me through the current storms in my life. Through the past 2 years, God has allowed me to go through many difficult and heartbreaking trails. Through these trials, I have see God do wonderful things in my life and people around me. My faith has been tested and has grown stronger. I've questioned God and seen Him work in wonderful ways.

Originally, I posted what awesome things God was doing in my life through these trials in Facebook statuses. I find that I think and process through events best by talking and writing them down. The statuses were quite long and I began to think that the best way to share would be through this blog format.

My hope is that my struggles and growths will encourage you. All of us go through struggles. Some are small and others shake us to our core and cause us not only to question the goodness of God, but also His existence. I've experienced these both this past year. It's not easy. It's yucky and painful. Hopefully  we can encourage each other!

At times my blog will be so honest that it's ugly. At moments when I question God and His goodness and His purpose I'll write about it. At other times, you'll rejoice withe me as I share the great things that He is doing. Life isn't easy. Christianity isn't easy. Trials are not easy. However, I do believe they will all be worth it when we stand before Him and are able to see His purposes behind the storms He allowed into our lives. When that time comes for me, I do not want to feel regretful (although I wonder if it is even possible to feel that in His presence). I do not want to think of all the joyous opportunities I missed because the storm scared me and caused me to hibernate until it was over. I want to know that I danced in the rain and saw each light God had peek through the storm clouds and the beautiful rainbow He made at the end. I want to know that I danced in the rain.

So, let's encourage each other. Let's laugh with one another. Let's learn how to dance in our storms together.

~Krista

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